Media, Bullying and Body Image

So much has happened since my last post and again I'm sorry dear readers for not getting back on track. Work and looking for a new job as well as being sick once again, it's like it's never ending being sick with these colds and flu symptoms. I guess such is the life of working in a call center. This time, and as I write this, I'm still ill with a chest infection and no voice. I have a major cough that comes and goes and is right into my chest and it sometimes hurts to even take a breath. I did go to the doctor and they told me the basics, sweat it out, get rest, use vaporub and take Advil, although I am also using a cough syrup for the mucus and phlegm which is helping significantly. Ginger ale is helping as well along with lots of chicken soup. It's interesting how chicken anything seems to help when one is ill.

Onto other topics of this week's entry, I'd like to address media, bullying and female body image this week. Yes I've addressed it before and I'll keep addressing it especially since it's in the media so much. In fact I think part of my addressing it so much is because I'm addressing my own image, my own self esteem. I personally have been the subject of bullying and yes I admit that I bully myself. It's not right and I have to get out of it but how? Well hopefully with support and with writing this I will eventually.

Body shaming is a topic that has been brought up in the media especially of late concerning the show "The Biggest Loser". Now I admit I've never watched it. I've never been inclined to do so nor buy the games or work out videos. Why? Because it's called "The Biggest Loser", why would I want to buy something or watch something that makes it sound that you're a loser if you're big? I have heavy friends and none of them are losers in any sense of the word. Why do we subject ourselves to this nonsense? It's not about losing weight in a healthy manner, it's about winning a game show by losing the weight the fastest and in an unsafe or unhealthy manner. The winner this year admits that perhaps she lost the weight too fast and personally after looking at her before and after, I feel that she could actually benefit from gaining a few pounds because her frame was built for it. You need some flesh on your bones. Now admittedly this also goes to the flip side too, because I also have friends who are super thin who can't gain any weight at all. But I feel that their body structure and genetics have determined this and that doesn't make who they are inside, they also aren't losers.

It annoys me too when we're watching tv and these "reality" tv shows, which aren't "reality" at all because they aren't realistic, even my father agrees with this in general discussion and feels annoyed by them, and those people that are heavy themselves are doing the shaming. I was sitting one day with colleagues and there was a show on tv about these people who are 600 lbs overweight and have gotten surgery and their success in keeping it off or not. It follows their life and diet a while before and after the surgery and how they are doing. Ok so some of them do well and some of them needed it because otherwise they wouldn't have lived much longer if they hadn't but some go into a slump, some don't know what else to do with themselves. I've read and seen people talk about this and how they went from "fat" to "slim" and found themselves looking at someone new in the mirror. They don't know who they are, they feel they've lost their identity. So they go into depression, they have people complimenting them on their new figure and such but then they just feel that the outside is what made them and that's all that's important. Why do we do this? Here my colleagues are laughing at these people that can't make it, that go into this slump and laughing at them because they're fat or heavy, and here I'm listening to them thinking, this shows what kind of people you really are to make fun of what some would consider a weakness.

It's not just shows, it's also advertising, we think for example that to be sexy we have to wear said perfume and to get the guy we have to have perfect hair and make up and clothes. Do we? We are independent women. What are we teaching our daughters? What are we teaching our sons? Here are just  three articles that I found, one about bullying  another about the "mother wound" and another about how sexualized ads are affecting us.  Also too why are we playing around with the idea of a "fat" barbie? This annoys me too. Barbie was meant to be a doll, exactly that a doll, not a role model, a play thing. Our mothers and fathers should be our role models. Yes I played with dolls, yes my sister played with them, heck even my brother played with dolls! There is nothing wrong with it! We used to dress up, play with make up, dress like clowns, dig in the dirt and build forts, climb trees, help mom in the kitchen and help dad in the backyard. It didn't matter if it was a "girl" thing or a "boy" thing to do! We looked to our parents to guide us not Barbie. Barbie wasn't my perfect figured woman in the first place when I looked at her, sure she was pretty and stuff and had cool clothes,but that just inspired me to make my own! My sister and I used to play around with fabric with our own bodies and our dolls, we used piece things together. We didn't watch a lot of tv growing up. So why are we now having it so that we're playing with the notion that Barbie is such a role model that we have to make her look "fat" or "slim" or just the right proportions? Yes she should perhaps be a normal looking person and when you actually were to put her dimensions in real life she's unrealistic to a T but should we be like her? No. Here is the debate. And here is more about the Human Barbie whom I feel needs some serious counselling and is in delusions. She really needs help! Please feel free to weigh in with comments below.

Now here is a media spark that I loved and I loved this reporter for doing this response, see the video here. Sometimes someone else just says certain things better than I or yourself can so I thought I'd share. I'd also like to share this lady's response as well to this media epidemic here. And lastly to end this on a good note that there are good Samaritans and that out there we do not approve of bullying as a whole, and though this happened back in October, it's still a good thing that people can still stand up together. Here is the article and this is what we should be doing.

I end this entry now with hopes that this will spark some discussion. If you're a friend on my facebook feel free to post comments on the facebook post or feel free to comment here. :) Otherwise have a good week and if I don't write next week well, keep on the look out for at least two entries for March! Take care friends!

Mental Health Affecting Teens and Veterans and Obesity vs Our Protective Forces

Hello everyone!! I'm so sorry I haven't written for the entire month of January. I kind of took a month hiatus. That being said my health has not been the greatest. Since not having a massage over the holidays I found that my stress levels went up, my anxiety was high and on top of it all I was sick with the flu for quite some time. I am however recovered and as for the rest of January, I have gotten a couple of massages which have helped significantly. Not to mention that I am looking for a new job. Though any job can be potentially high stress depending on its nature, I need a new one. I need to get out of the work environment that I am in overall. 

January was also mental health month. Bell held their now annual "Let's Talk" day on the 28th of January as well. That being said I have been reading and looking at multiple reports about mental health and body health. I'm going to start with mental health and a report I watched on W5, a show here in Canada addressing multiple different issues in the world particularly here in my own country. What they started with was stress and teen suicide, particularly those in college and the fact that it is on the rise. They are trying many efforts to make people more aware of mental health issues and stress to lower this. However there are a lot of factors that come into play when going to college or even just an entirely new situation that thrusts you into what you feel like is "alone". I know, because I've done it several times over. But unlike me there are a lot of young people that can't handle it and have no where to turn or feel that they don't or won't speak about it because yes, it is still taboo to talk about anything wrong with you. The report spoke to one young lady who was even kicked out of her residency by vote of her peers because she attempted suicide. Instead of helping her, instead of being a friend or providing support they thrust her into a more of an alone state because of this taboo, as if you're going to "catch it". Now she does charity work and does a lot to try to help others and has graduated because she did get the assistance she needed. She suffers from depression which is also a more and more common thing now a days too among a variety of ages.  I don't suffer from depression, not in the way that those diagnosed with it do. I do suffer from anxiety and sometimes social anxiety, I know several peers and coworkers that also suffer from depression and my mother suffers from schizophrenia which has been misdiagnosed by many doctors and has an even stronger stigma. 

I grew up with this. I felt alone, I felt overwhelmed and I struggled through a lot. I survived. I know that there are many others out there that are going or have gone through the same thing who think that suicide is the only way out. I thought that way too. I thought that there was no one there to help me and that those that were there couldn't understand or weren't seeing what I was seeing because I was a child and they were the adult. I was being brainwashed by my mother, who at the time because of her illness would manipulate the situations we were in, to believe that my father was a horrible abusive person which he is not. I'll make it clear that he definitely is not and is one of the kindest people you'll ever meet. But in her mind, in her delusional state, that is what she led us to believe and that's what she believed and there were many times she also turned this on me. Led me to believe that I too was a horrible manipulative person who didn't care and was some kind of monster or dirty horrible person. I have low self esteem. I don't blame her per se, she couldn't help her illness, and there is a lot that was fueled by other things and some of it was my own doing as I got older, to allow other people and bullying to bring me to that state. I even wanted to run away and die in the forest near my school, and I thank a very special person, he knows who he is and I will forever be grateful , who turned me around. He came back and got me when I wouldn't come back in and told me I have something to live for. That I could make a different and that I have people who look to me like my siblings. And that's just it, you need to know there is something to live and fight for even if it's a memory of someone, to bring their story to everyone else, to help others, to do something somewhere somehow that is great and awesome no matter how small it may seem. That simple smile or laugh can brighten someone's lives! It can be that simple turning point that you don't even know about. Just helping someone pick up their groceries or when they're having a tough day, you don't have any idea what those little things can truly mean to someone. So when you think of suicide, when you think you're at the lowest low, know that there is something and someone that you can influence and that you have your part in this world and it's not over yet! 

Moving on, the report also focused on soldiers coming back from war that aren't getting help. They're poor, broke and broken. Mentally, physically. They go back and their families get broken and torn apart. Why? Because of Post traumatic stress disorder or aka ptsd. They get filled with drugs and such to "help" them and this is certainly not helping. In fact it is making most worse. So there is a new program here that they are trying using service dogs. :) This makes me happy because it gives a good dog a home and they can be trained and it's helping these men and women who are coming back from traumatic and trained experiences to be on alert and watching over their back every second. Even the slightest popping sound could set them off or upset them and there are settings like malls that are overcrowded and overwhelming with people and noise and having a partner to watch your back is a comforting and great thing to have. Thing is of course pharmaceutical companies don't want to give up and want to make money so they are trying to say at one point that these dogs don't work and drugs do but they have a higher success rate than the drugs. These men and women are paying for their dog and any training etc. required because the government wouldn't pay for it deeming it not a medical item that they could cover, again because the companies want money. 

I don't understand why the government, or anyone, other than control purposes and money, would want a bunch of people on drugs rather than a functioning healthy workforce/country. They want us to be all drug addicts and blinded so that they can do what they want with us. Ok ok... maybe I won't get into the conspiracy theories right now, however they are going through my head and I'm sure they go through many other people's heads too! 

Moving on, speaking of armed forces and such, I read another report in the local paper a few weeks ago that indicated that our Canadian forces and Police officers are now considered overweight. They have to meet certain standards to qualify not just with mental tests but physical and most entrants can't meet that. I know I couldn't but then I wasn't aiming to be part of the military etc. however I can't even lift my own weight like I used to. I've gained too much. Thing is that we've become what you see on tv, those doughnut eating officers and some of them can't run, roll or jump or do what is expected to really protect our country and or cities/towns. I'm not expecting super abs or anything like Arnold but being fit would be expected if  you are going to do these things and I would think that you would meet the tests. I can understand getting older, sitting behind a desk all day, as what I do and can attest to that you do get older and fatter sitting all day, however if you're out and about  you should be required to walk and you should be required not to sit in your car all day. You should be required to go to the gym at least 3 -5 times a week as part of your regimen for these fields of work. I've seen fitter nurses and doctors than I do officers and that says something! 

And that's a wrap for this week's post. I'll be trying for the month of February to do more and write again once per week. I definitely have accumulated some topics to speak about over the holidays etc. Again anyone who has suggestions can feel free to comment.  Take care everyone!!